Sunday, 28 February 2010
When I walked into the bar where Mr Writer's book launch was being held I naturally had a scout around to suss out the other guests. I immediately felt overdressed. I'd decided to wear a black strapless short lace dress which had a netted underskirt and bright purple suede heels. I generally make a big effort when I go out, mainly because it's such a novelty for me and I love to dress up. But there were people wearing casual jeans there, I began to wish that I'd just worn my skinny jeans, heels and my red leopard print top as originally planned. Mr Writer had told me that his girlfriend was going to be wearing a fantastically beautiful vintage dress so I immediately felt under pressure. Not because I wanted to out-do her or make Mr Writer notice me but because I didn't want to feel inadequate. I wanted to feel good about myself. When I finally introduced myself to Mr Writer's girlfriend one of the first things she said to me was, "I love your dress". Result, self image restored.

There were some famous faces amongst the crowd, a lead singer from a major band, a well known TV/radio personality, both who were good friends of Mr Writer. So when he personally mentioned my name amongst a select few in his thank you speech it really blew me away, it was totally unexpected but there was something missing throughout the whole experience.....Mr Rockstar.

I missed him, I missed him big time. Before I knew it I couldn't stop thinking about him, I didn't care about the book launch I just wanted to be with him. This was all wrong. I'd looked forward to this night for ages and suddenly I found myself not wanting to be there without him. It felt wrong that he wasn't with me.

On the Friday I met up with my old school friend and also met her beautiful 5 month old baby son for the first time. Having been asked by Mother upon hearing about my trip if I thought I might feel broody, I'd answered a fairly definite "no". I was wrong.

I came back on the train last night with only two thoughts in my head, Mr Rockstar and babies or maybe it was babies first and then Mr Rockstar? Either way, this was worrying. I knew I should have flown down, I would have had less time to think so deeply about things.

As the train drew slowly back into Waverley Station the anticipation of seeing Mr Rockstar at the end of the platform waiting for me was almost unbearable. When he swept me up in his arms, held me tight and kissed me (yes, it really was that romantic!) that's when it all clicked. It suddenly dawned on me that at Mr Writer's book launch it was quite possible that I had found my potential rock star husband to be, it was just that he didn't need to be physically there for me to realise it.


Lottie said...


It's all like a movie!

Happy for you

Lottie x

Kitty Moore said...

That was beautifully written and made me feel warm and fuzzy x

Bird on a Wire said...

Awh, thanks you two.




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Bird on a Wire
Imagine Carrie from Sex and the City morphed with Bridget Jones and a baby thrown in for added entertainment – that’s me, the ever optimistic romantic looking for my Mr Big but already with child! Read my blog from the beginning where I find out I am pregnant following a brief fling with my much older male colleague and fast forward to where I am now, stressed out working mum to my beautiful 10 year old daughter wondering if love really does in fact exist at first sight.
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