Sunday 26 August 2001
I feel I'm really getting to know this baby now. It's just so active and makes me laugh so much. I'm just so desperate to know what it looks like, whether it's a boy or a girl but at the same time shitting myself about the whole labour thing.

My pushchair has arrived and I spent most of the evening trying to get the knack of all the gadgets etc. It's an amazing thing. I have the Dr tomorrow and will now have to go every week. My stretchmarks are absolutely repulsive and I constantly wonder will my body ever recover? I still have to complete my birthing plan and need to think about packing my hospital bags as the baby could come early.

I feel like I'm carry a boy, they say ("they" being old wives) that if you're all out the front with your bump then it's a boy, which I am. The issue is that Daniel already has 2 daughters and there's a part of me that thinks that it would make such a difference if the baby was a boy, he'd be more interested then. I hate that, I just wish I felt neutral because although I don't think I would, I would hate to feel disappointed at having a girl. When I think about all the lovely girly clothes you can get, pinks, ribbons, bunches, going to see Robbie together (I would just be escorting of course!). God, I can't believe I've just about done it!

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Bird on a Wire
Imagine Carrie from Sex and the City morphed with Bridget Jones and a baby thrown in for added entertainment – that’s me, the ever optimistic romantic looking for my Mr Big but already with child! Read my blog from the beginning where I find out I am pregnant following a brief fling with my much older male colleague and fast forward to where I am now, stressed out working mum to my beautiful 10 year old daughter wondering if love really does in fact exist at first sight.
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